There are all kinds of milestones on our children’s journey to adulthood and independence. Their first steps, potty trained, first day of school – just to name a few, but there is one that no one talks about and is more terrifying than all the other early milestones (at least to me). This is experienced only by the parent of the opposite gender child (being female and having 2 sons, I get to go through it with each child while my hubby gets to avoid it completely). What am I talking about? The first solo trip into the public restroom, of course.
The first time the I realized vaguely that this milestone was approaching was when my oldest turned 4 and I walked into the gym changing room with both boys in tow and read the sign on the door, “Boys over 5 years old must use Men’s changing room.” The sign is innocent enough, and I’d seen it hundreds of times, but for some reason that day it might have well as said, “Hey you! SOON you will have to make your son go change by himself in a room full of strange men so get ready!” A panicked monologue began in my brain, “What the heck!!! My baby boy can’t always come in here with me??? Dang! Oh noooooo, public restrooms apply too! Stop, slow down, I’M not ready! HE’S not ready!” Quickly my brain came to terms with the deadline being a year away and I calmed my internal panic.
Then the day came. He wasn’t 5, and it wasn’t the changing room. Nope. My husband had just walked out of the restaurant with our youngest to load up in the car. I told my son we needed to use the restroom before we go and he turned to me and said, “but Momma I want to use the Dadda restroom.” I explained that I had to go pee and Dadda was already out at the car. Then the hammer came down. “No Momma, I want to go in the Dadda restroom all by myself.” Well, dang! Deep breath. Internally I thought, “he’s taken the lead, let him go, don’t hold him back.” Verbally, all I said was, “ok” and he took my hand and we walked over to the restrooms. We stopped and I let him do our normal routine of identifying which was which and he said, “There’s the super hero cape so that’s the Momma one – you go in there, and I’m going in this one for Dadda’s.” (You bet I taught him the dress is a super hero cape!) I told him I’d be waiting outside when he was done. I have never pee’d so fast in my life! I washed my hands and went outside to wait for him. It was a looong wait (maybe because I pee’d so fast or maybe just because I was anxious). Finally, he came out with still wet hands with one of proudest smiles he’s worn.
So, so many milestones for them, and this one is the unspoken one. But just like any other milestone, we aren’t ready, we hold our breath, and revel in how proud they are of themselves once it’s accomplished. Any just like the others, afterwards we realize how much easier it is for us now that they are capable of it. So, I’m celebrating the unspoken milestone- one down, one to go!
Cheers to going to the super hero room ALONE!
-Rebecca
Mamas On The Move 